You are NOT the only guy who is afraid of dating.
But there aren’t any magic cures or secrets.. to alleviate social anxiety and become more comfortable with the dating scene, there’s honestly nothing better than practice. The more you put yourself in dating situations, the more comfortable you’re going to get and the more likely you are going to overcome your fear of dating.
Read on for some tips to get started…
(And… when you are finished reading, please take 42 seconds to write a comment sharing one of your dating fears. I’d like to help you and I’ll be sure to answer personally.)
Bring women to comfortable places.
Of course, initially it’s going to be a little difficult, so my suggestion is to pick great places for dates where you’re most comfortable. Pick a local place you usually go to by yourself or with a few mates where you participate in events or even just go to relax over coffee or a drink. It doesn’t really matter the location, so long as you’re comfortable in that environment and practicing bringing someone else into that world. This will begin to gradually alleviate your fear of dating.
Relax… it’s just a date.
The second thing is to stop putting so much pressure on yourself. Dating can be much like job interviewing, where you’re learning about another person (and position) and they’re learning about you. Except, in dating, try to keep things more fun and relaxed than a job interview. You want her to enjoy herself and not feel like she’s under pressure, even if you feel that way. The easiest way to ensure she doesn’t feel uncomfortable is by making women laugh with humor or a few simple jokes. Humor always helps put people at ease. And the more comfortable she feels, the more comfortable you’ll feel and the more natural things will be overall.
You also want to watch that you don’t turn the date into a sales pitch. Don’t feel like you have to sell yourself too much or put unnatural effort into displaying yourself as a cool person. Just relax and be yourself. And don’t be scared to show a bit of vulnerability. If you are nervous, it’s okay. She probably is, too. Perhaps even say it: “I don’t date that often, so I’m a little bit nervous.” She’ll probably say, “I am too.” Then you can relax and even laugh about it.
Ask her questions… be interested in her.
Finally, ask questions. Women like to feel like you’re interested in what they think and do. The more questions and more inquisitive and interested you are toward her, the more likely she’ll open up and feel comfortable with you. This will takes the pressure off you even more, because she’ll be doing most of the talking. You just have to listen (and actually pay attention): If you find out information about her that you can relate to, you can reciprocate with your own experiences, which also aids to the making you both comfortable.
Just make sure you’re the one leading the interaction: Don’t just get her started and listen to her ramble on and on. You’ve got to gauge the type of person she is: If she’s a very extroverted girl, she may want to do a lot of talking and be quite comfortable with it; If she’s somewhat shy, embarrassed, introverted, or a little cold toward you, you will have to work harder initially to get her to open up and feel comfortable around you. If that’s the case—you’re the one having to do the talking initially and you’re nervous—before you go on a date, think of topics for conversation, such as things that came up in your life that would lead to questions for her or things she could relate to and would want to respond to.
It’s always good to have a few topics and jokes on hand to help fill in the silence and help her warm up—since this will also help you feel at ease. Again, try not to act like you’re on an interview. And don’t make her feel like she’s on one. If you can keep a handle on all of this and show her you’re really interested in her, your fear of dating phobia will soon be a thing of the past!
(Again… please take a few seconds to write a comment sharing one of your dating fears. I’d like to help you and I’ll be sure to answer personally.)
And I’m going to share a secret with you…
Something that most men never learn, and most women will never know about themselves (and after you hear this you’ll never want to share because this will get you into bed with any woman–in half the time).
Women… are a TYPE.
That’s right. They are one of 8. And once you know how to identify which of the 8 they are you’ll be able to get her to go beyond her own first date fears, break all of her “rules” and beg you to take her…
Want to cut to the chase and learn exactly what it is she is dying for you to say to get her naked—fast?
Check this out right now before she discovers just how much you don’t know!
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