a break up is your chance for a breakthrough to more of what you really want… with whoever you want…
So, what are some of the upsides to breaking up with a girlfriend?
I think for me personally the biggest upside is that it allows me to put more energy back into myself. The biggest challenge I found while being in a relationship is that I could not make decisions without contemplating how they might affect someone else.
Obviously, there are positive sides to that in a relationship, but the great news is that as soon as you break up that relationship, you are no longer responsible for the good feelings that the other person experiences.
This is a fantastically liberating experience. It’s like a certain tether or chain has been removed.
You will immediately begin to notice that there is a huge amount of free time, a huge freedom of emotional energy, and you will also discover that when you break up, you suddenly begin coming up with all of these new creative ideas on how to make your life better.
When those ideas surface, really embrace them and go with them. The biggest problem I see with guys post-break up, is that they do not see the amazing possibilities of potential growth for them as a person.
Any experience that is even a little bit challenging gives us the opportunity to explore who we are, and who we want to be, and this can provide a huge potential for growth. Many times I think back to the experiences I have had in my life, the times I had setbacks, and I would certainly include the more powerful breakups in that category. And what I see is that the more powerful the relationships I had were, the greater the catalyst for the next era of growth for me.
Another important consideration is to analyze why you broke up with your girlfriend.
What was the cause of the break up?
Was it something she was doing wrong?
In some cases, it will not be. In some cases, the girl was just ready to move on, maybe it was because she had some messed up value system, but a lot of the times, if guys are really good at the process of self evaluation and self awareness, they’ll be able to identify a couple of things that they were not doing perfectly, and that might actually assist them in the future by becoming a better person.
I think it is really important that guys identify the positive results of a break up, as well as some of the negative things.
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