Get the thing that women respect most PLUS discover why one of the best ways to improve your networking ability and invigorate your social life is develop the skill of chatting with random strangers.
Building connections in your life, meeting new friends, and having the ability to entertain and attract women will improve your quality of life and make life worth living to the fullest. The more relationships you have in your life, the more fulfilling your life will be. People who have great relationships, great friends, and a positive outlook on life live longer than people who don’t. This is why it is so important to have the ability to chat with random strangers.
Chatting with random strangers is the only way to make new friends.
A change in mindset…
If you’re naturally shy and introverted, then you really need to invest a fair amount of time in the skill of talking to random strangers. Let me tell you, it will be worth the effort and getting it right is going to dramatically change your life.
The first thing that really helped me when learning to chat with strangers is changing my mindset. The thought of venturing out of my comfort zone and leaving my warm and comfy home just to get out there talking to people frankly gave me the willies.
It just seemed so overwhelming, because I was looking at it in the context of being difficult and not pleasant at all. I thought of it as some arduous task, and I rather enjoyed sitting at home watching TV or playing video games or just chatting online to my friends.
Once I shifted my mindset, I saw the benefits that it could bring into my life. I saw how different I could be once I mastered this skill. It was this realization that changed my mindset, and with that new mindset my drive and determination to make it happen intensified. You need to start seeing every interaction you have with a girl or any new person in your life, whether it be a potential business partner or a possible relationship, as a major growth curve.
Change your perception of people…
You have got to start looking at everyone as being another step closer to achieving your overall goal in life of bringing in more happiness so that you can enjoy more of life. Having that shift in your mindset will make chasing and achieving this goal so much more fun and will increase your motivation.
When you’re out there trying to chat with random strangers, never judge a book by its cover. If you do this, you may miss the one person who could have actually added value to your life. Most people out in the real world have something to offer, and so do you! Never hold yourself back in your attempts at interactions based on stereotyping a person by the way they look. Your goal is not to bed every chick, it’s to get out there and meet new people and add friends to your life.
How do you go about creating a mindset shift?
What I recommend is to write down where you see yourself in a couple of years. Write down the kind of person that you want to be and the type of people that you want in your life. The best way to make this happen is to improve your social skills. Set goals in your life, get out there, and make things happen.
The most common hindrance that holds guys back from social situations and interactions, and the biggest deterrent for becoming more sociable, is the fear of rejection. We often fear people rejecting us for who we are. Shyness and being a bit uncomfortable in social situations is a common reality for a lot of guys. In order to be more outgoing, you have got to learn to be less shy.
Learn to not take things personally: people’s reactions are not always about you…
The best way to deal with rudeness and rejection is to not take things personally. Stop wearing your feelings on your shoulder, because at least 95% of the time when a person reacts negatively to you it has absolutely nothing to do with you personally. Most likely, they’re having a bad day or you caught them at a wrong moment. Maybe they’ve been harassed by people in the past and assume you have bad intentions.
They may just not be that cool to begin with, and you wouldn’t gain much from knowing them anyway. It’s important that you just frame it as nothing against you personally and that their attitude has more to do with them as the person they truly are.
Learn to smile, because a smile is sunshine for the soul!
One of the best ways to ramp up your social skills and learn to talk to strangers is to practice smiling at people. Nod your head and say hi. If you’re going to walk to the subway or stroll through town, just smile at people and nod your head as you pass and say hi.
I, personally, have always been a smiler. That is the one characteristic that I am remembered for. A smile may be just the thing that brightens someone’s life who happens to be having a crappy day. If you are sincere in wanting to have better social skills, then you have got to learn to smile. Who wants to be approached by a Grumpy Gus?
Finding common ground is always a good place to start an interaction…
Once you’re in a social situation, find something in the room or in life that you can comment on. Start being more aware of your surroundings. For instance, if there’s something happening in the room that you can draw attention to, then use this as a conversation starter.
If a picture interests you, approach someone and ask what they think about it. If there are appetizers at a party, then while your grabbing one chat up the someone at the table and ask them what they think about the food. Just be more observational and more aware of what’s happening around you and use it to your advantage. Making small talk is the best way to get a conversation started.
Ask open-ended questions…
An open-ended question is one that needs more than a simple yes or no as an answer. People love talking about themselves. For most people, the number one topic in their life is themselves. Go up and initiate a conversation by showing interest. Comment on something they’re wearing and ask them where they got it. If someone has on a very attractive scent, then comment and ask them what cologne or perfume they’re wearing and where they got it.
If you can learn to stop, look, and listen, you can learn a lot about people. Once you spot a group that you’d like to approach, stand on the sideline for a bit and just listen. Once you hear something that you can relate to, then jump in feet first and join the conversation.
It’s the only way anyone ever makes new friends. Friends don’t start out as friends, they start out as random strangers. Chatting with random strangers is how friendships and relationships are formed.