So, a guy discovers that his girlfriend has gone out without him. What should his reaction be when he finds out that his girlfriend has gone out without him knowing it?
First of all, you want to know why she is going out without telling you. Is she worried that you’re going to get jealous? Is she worried that you’re going to react in a certain way? Is she going out because she’s perhaps meeting a guy, or going out to flirt with men and get some validation?
First of all, you want to establish why she is doing it, talk to her and find out. Before you react emotionally and get upset, sit there and hear the truth. If she’s lying and you can feel that she’s lying then it’s really important that you call her up on that. Say that you really don’t feel like she’s telling you the truth and make her come out with the truth. Make her like pour her heart out and tell you the real reason.
The boyfriend is very insecure and controlling in relationships and therefore the only way she can go out and enjoy herself is if she lies.
Often when that happens, and from my own past experience it is because the girlfriend has a jealous boyfriend. So, if she’s doing that and it’s because you want to feel that you’re in control of her, then it’s important to really look at yourself and find out why you’re so insecure and jealous and why have you got trust issues with your girlfriend.
Where is it coming from? Is it some deeper issue that you have with yourself, and it’s probably more of a reflection of you than of your girlfriend? It’s also an opportunity to go out and deal with the jealousy and your confidence and self-esteem issues. But, I think, really it’s got to come down to a communication thing.
A relationship should be – when two people come together and they share a journey in life.
But I really think both parties should still be able to have a separate life and still be able to go out and do the things that they used to enjoy. But, really still support each other throughout the journey. It’s important that your partner still goes out and enjoys herself and does those things.
But, you need to realize that you need to have trust in her. If you’re lacking in that trust, if you feel like she’s prone to cheat on you or sit with other guys – then that’s a different issue in itself. That’s either a reflection of you or it’s a reflection that your partner is probably not really in love with you and it might be time to move on.