Get past the hype and focus on results. No results = no good.
It's just a lot of noise if it can't deliver a girl like this...
What is your opinion on taking online relationship advice from guys? Guys who have been there and grown from it?
I’m really big on making sure that if you’re going to be taking advice for dating, that you choose someone who walks the walk doesn’t just talk the talk.
In the online dating community, there are a lot of people who are all too happy to talk about what you should say to a woman in a particular situation, or what you should do in a particular situation. Its great to do some research and get some online relationship advice. But a lot of the time, if the guys giving the advice haven’t actually gone through the process of trying this information out themselves, then it can actually do you more harm than good.
So you need to be really selective in whom you take dating advice from and who you want to receive information from.
The ultimate litmus test with getting advice is try it out and if it works, keep it. If it doesn’t work, let it go.
Too often, guys try to persist with advice that has been given by other people; even though these are people who aren’t able to be effective with that same advice themselves. Or I see guys who maybe have a specific niche of women that they’re hitting on, and perhaps their advice is more applicable and successful in those particular cases. The other time that advice is non-universal is when the guy giving the advice has some personal characteristics that really assist them.
So ultimately, what you’ve got to do is improve your ability at trying information on, putting it into practice, and making your own decisions on whether it’s something that you want to keep.
I think one of the other dangers of guys hitting up internet forums, is that most guys that go on an internet forum look for the magic pill. They look for that magic bullet that they can add, or that one little trick, or that one little tactic that they can add to their game, that is going to solve all of their dating problems.
What usually happens is when they find something that they get excited about, they develop a little bit of plausible confidence, and they start getting out with more passion. They’re a little bit more exuberant when they get out and meet women.
As a result of that, they start to have a little bit of dating success, and they feel like they’ve hit the jackpot. They feel like they know that there is one element of the game that they were missing, that’s really going to take them to the next level.
But ultimately, what happens over time is that they begin to slow down, and maybe their success starts to drop off, and they don’t quite get the consistency they were getting before. So they go back to the drawing board of trying to find that next thing big that’s going to be able to improve their game and once again create a bit of success. Over a period of years, as men scour these online forums in search for that next magic bullet, what happens is that guys add a lot of things to their game.
They add different openings. They add different techniques on how to stand. They add different things that you can say.
What really happens however, is that they end up creating a lot of noise around them. The information that’s really relevant gets drowned in the noise. Indeed, guys who have been involved in online communities for maybe two or three years will often find that they start to go backwards. They start to get less effective responses from women.
So, if you’re someone who is going through these online forums and looking to get information from people who have been there, I encourage you to do that, but only up to a point. Because sooner or later, you need to take a step back and say: “Now, instead of focusing on what I add to my game; what can I remove from my game? What are some of the things that are just creating excess noise, that are distracting the girl from letting my real nature shine through?”
Because remember: perfection is achieved, not when there is nothing more to add, but when there is nothing left to take away.
Where have you received your relationship advice from in the past? What has been the result of taking that advice?
Put it to the test
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