You want to know what shaping is, right?
You’ve heard it used… and you know it is powerful.
But what is it EXACTLY…
Girls have a natural tendency to want to please you.
They have a natural, nurturing side to them whereby they will actually feel good if they get the sensation that they’re looking after you. A lot of guys are reluctant to let a girl please them. They feel like maybe she won’t be excited by what she’s doing, or that she’s just doing it because she feels like she has to, and that she doesn’t actually like it. The truth is girls do like it. Not only are they willing to do things to please you, but they actually like doing them. They get a sense of satisfaction and validation from it.
Tell her what pleases you.
Just being able to communicate to a girl what it is that actually pleases you is really important. The earlier you can do this in the relationship, and the earlier that you can let her know that it’s a positive characteristic, the more likely she’s going to want to continue to do it. This comes down to the principle of shaping.
Bring out what is already in her.
Shaping is essentially where we highlight something that already exists in the subconscious mind of a girl, and then by bringing it up, by highlighting it, we’re able to magnify it by identifying or helping her remember times where she’s fallen into alignment with this behavior.
An example would be if she cooks dinner for you. You can, really early in the relationship, let her know that you love it when she cooks dinner for you. You feel like she’s treating you like a king. The more you reward her for that positive behavior, the more likely she is to fall into alignment with that and want to do it for you.
Set her up to please you… over and over again.
If you can set that as a frame early on in the relationship, what will happen is that you won’t have to continually keep reshaping. If you can setup the framework that you want early on, that frame will last for the length of the relationship. An example I like to use, which has been a really big shift for me, is that I love to get blowjobs.
When I first started having success with women, I would focus on going down on them first, before we even got to the regular sex. However, what I’ve done now is that I focus on getting a girl to go down on me really early in the relationship, and I set the precedent that I love it when she goes down on me. I basically let her go down on me for an extended period of time.
Because I set that frame early on in the relationship, it will only continue to progress. That just becomes something that she knows that I’ll like, and she goes out of her way to do it to me more often. So I think that’s one example that guys can use, but it really depends on what his preferences are, and what he wants to be shaping her towards.
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