How can a guy improve his social skills?
If you have other questions about being social, please ask in the comments. I answer each one personally.
Even if he knows that being more social is better, it’s often hard to take that first step. What are some things that an antisocial, more analytical, stay-at-home kind of guy can look into? What kind of mindset should he have in terms of dating? What are some of the things he can do to help him get out of his shell without having to jump straight into the fray?
How can he practice being more social?
First of all, let’s put dating to the side for now.
We really want to focus on what’s important here, which is working on your ability to be more social. The truth is, if you can’t go outside and you can’t talk to people, then it’s going to be very hard to improve your dating. What we have to understand about this is that, to some degree, we all have a certain level of what we would call social anxiety. There’s a good chance that if you’re really antisocial and afraid of opening up and talking to other people, that you have social anxiety.
Social anxiety can actually be quite crippling, and it can be very difficult to deal with, but there are options.
I’d say the first step is to focus on working on overcoming social anxiety. You can definitely do a Google search and find many great resources. I would suggest that Cognitive Behavioral Therapy is a great approach for dealing with social anxiety, and there’s even a great program that uses CBT as a basis for helping guys learn to be more social.
Again, a Google search will help you find this. It’s called, “Overcoming social anxiety, step-by-step.”
Now, step-by-step is important. A lot of the time, when we start to work on ourselves, we want to run before we walk, or walk before we crawl, and it’s actually the small, incremental steps that we make that are going to have the biggest impact on us. Working on a program which allows you to deal with your social anxiety step by step will get you further along than trying to jump in at the deep end.
Socializing is actually really good for our personal well-being.
There’s a good chance that if we’re feeling negative, down, or lonely, that our well-being isn’t at its best. There is some correlation between being depressed and the fact that we’re not talking to many people and becoming disconnected. As humans, we actually crave social support, and being a part of society is a part of our programming. It’s important that we socialize just for our general well-being.
Until you’ve started to really work on your social anxiety, I would say that you shouldn’t worry too much about your dating skills or even your pickup skills. Focus on improving your general social skills first.
Not only will working on this fundamental set of skills really help you with women, but it will help you start to get out there and feel more confident talking to just about anyone. A great site for improving your social skills with a lot of resources and a lot of insights would be www.succeedsocially.com. Dating is definitely a social game, and meeting women requires a certain level of social skills.
A great way to overcome social anxiety is to understand the psyche of women…
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